FOR CLIENTS - It's FREE!

MISMANAGED HEALTH CARE - What's $940 Billion between friends? Choose your favorite:

No worries! Insurance companies are inherently fair; just look at their past track record.
20% (1 vote)
Let me think. No job, no house, no more unemployment check. But you raise my taxes and charge me an insurance premium. WTF?
0% (0 votes)
It's a War on Health and we're in it to win it. Just like the War on Drugs, the War on Crime, and the War on Poor Math Skills.
20% (1 vote)
As your doctor, I advise you to take two aspirin and don't call me in the morning.
0% (0 votes)
Thank you, Congressman! You plugged my donut hole and left me with a whoopie pie.
20% (1 vote)
They call it universal because it even covers you if you're abducted by aliens from outer space.
0% (0 votes)
This is really about regulating the price of opium from Afghanistan.
0% (0 votes)
My lawyer said next time the doctor calls me a crybaby, I can still sue, right?
0% (0 votes)
Holy Forefathers, Batman, you're a socialist!
0% (0 votes)
The robot will see you now.
20% (1 vote)
Ten years of medical school, half a million dollars in debt on educational loans, all for about $5 a patient. Where do I sign?
0% (0 votes)
Uncle Sam Wants You to see your doctor.
0% (0 votes)
If my computer gets a virus, will it be covered?
0% (0 votes)
If you ask me, we need more government bureaucracy like a moose needs a hatrack.
0% (0 votes)
Relax. It's just the bastard love child of a union between Social Security and Medicare.
0% (0 votes)
May cause dizziness, anxiety, nausea, lactaid intolerance, and bankruptcy. If symptoms persist, call your state representative.
20% (1 vote)
Uh, you say it will cost how much? And that it will reduce the deficit? Oh, I get it now.
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 5

Feel me? After all that Stimulus, what's the climax?

Better start speaking Mandarin.
29% (2 votes)
Love those drugs. What's good for Big Pharma is fine with moi.
0% (0 votes)
Don't ask me. I'm a Republicrat. I voted No.
0% (0 votes)
It's all about the Great Society. That's why I'm a Demican.
0% (0 votes)
The only thing we make anymore is babies. They're the ones who will pay later.
14% (1 vote)
Why do you think it's called a Piggy Bank?
14% (1 vote)
No worries. Your insurance company loves you. They have your DNA to prove it.
0% (0 votes)
What happened? I woke up and suddenly the Communists won!
14% (1 vote)
I don't care. Just tell me what the final score was in last night's game.
0% (0 votes)
I guess there is free lunch! Gimme public ed, subsidized rent, mass transit, unemployment and health care coverage for nothing!
29% (2 votes)
Total votes: 7

UNIVERSAL HEALTH CARE : Unbridled Socialism? Meet the New Boss. Same as the Old Boss!

Cash for Clunkers! I'll trade in this old body any day of the week!
14% (1 vote)
All the free medicinal marijuana you can score? I love it!
0% (0 votes)
I'm in favor so long as it covers shiatsu, acupuncture, reflexology, meditation, chiropractor, yoga, drumming and Burning Man!
57% (4 votes)
They're going to implant microchips in your earlobe and then UFO's can probe you in your sleep!
0% (0 votes)
Face lifts, tummy tucks, nose jobs and breast implants - 50% off!
14% (1 vote)
Not good. Word is it gonna slash the street price of oxy, meth and e. Then how's an innocent dope dealer make a honest living?
0% (0 votes)
Canadian, Russian, British system. Who cares. India runs our phones now, China makes parts, Mexicans cut my lawn.
0% (0 votes)
Did somebody say, No New Taxes. That's funny. I thought Obama won the presidency.
14% (1 vote)
Momma always told me to marry a doctor. Just not a proctologist.
0% (0 votes)
Come to think of it, could you take a look at this thing right here. I think it's a growth or something....?
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 7

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